Ice Skating Shinigami
by icedragongurl
Summary: Rukia signs herself and Ichigo up for a partner ice skating contest. Issue 1: neither know how to skate and 2: It's against Ichigo's free will... how will this end? IchiRuki REVISED AND UPDATED!
1. Take 2: You did what?

**Ice skating Shinigami**

**Author: **Icedragongurl

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bleach so get over it! And if I did… you can bet that GinRan wouldn't be so tragic…. *cries*

**Chapter:** 1/**7**

**Summary: **Rukia signs herself and Ichigo up for a partner ice skating contest what will the end of this adventure look like… success or disaster?

**Author Note: **Enjoy Kaibasgirl! This is for you my dear, an updated version of Ice Skating Shinigami. Thought you might enjoy this. So here you go… Enjoy!

**Author Note 2: ** This is an updated version of the older (WAY older) original version of the first chapter, hopefully this one is MUCH MUCH better! I actually rewrote the entire thing.

It was just another ordinary day in Karakura town, which were actually quite rare as of late for the shinigami that occupied it. Even so, no hollows were around, the birds were singing a beautiful tune, and Rukia Kuchiki was looking forward to lazing about. She debated between reading a book, drawing, or watching some television. While the girl was making up her mind, she wandered into the kitchen. Her eyes were nearly blinded by how brightly the room shone; Yuzu had obviously gone to town while cleaning up after breakfast.

Grabbing a mug that had a Chappy icon on it, she filled it with some of the 'coffee' that Karin had introduced her to. The drink was at first far too bitter for her taste, but once some milk and sugar was added… it wasn't all that bad. She had discovered that she enjoyed some of the frivolities that existed in the mortal realm. After making her coffee the way she liked, Rukia went to go see what the two younger Kurosaki's were up to.

"Hey, what're you guys watching?" Yuzu and Karin looked up at her and smiled in response. The black haired Kurosaki gestured for her to sit and join them, which of course Rukia didn't need to be offered twice. The blonde girl answered her question with a wide smile,

"Professional ice skating, it's a lot of fun to watch!" The Kuchiki sat beside her and directed her attention to the moving image box. From what she'd seen so far, it seemed like an interesting sport indeed.

"What is it that they're gliding about on? Is it ice?" she asked in innocent curiosity. Yuzu giggled softly,

"Of course it is silly. Hence why it's called ice skating." Karin smirked,

"What a novel concept. That ice skating is done on ice." She said with no attempt to hide the sarcasm in her voice. Yuzu frowned at her sister in disapproval; the black haired girl simply rolled her eyes. Rukia was too intrigued by what she was watching to pay attention to what was going on around her. Enraptured by the figures that seemed to be dancing on air, it was such a fascinating concept.

"I think my favorite part is the partner skating contest." Yuzu said to her sister. Karin shrugged from her spot on the floor.

"Whatever. I prefer ice hockey, but my team can't use our old rink cause they're using it for the stupid ice skating lessons. Since there's gonna be a teen partner contest in six months." As the words left Karin, a light bulb seemed to go off in Rukia's head. She turned to the black haired girl with an evil grin on her face that screamed mischief of divine proportions.

"Where is this…rink… of yours?"

**The Following Day**

"Oh Ichigo!" came the melodious call of his name, the carrot haired boy cringed. He knew full well what that tone meant, and the split second that the girl entered his bedroom, Ichigo immediately answered with a curt,

"No." he didn't even bother to look up from his homework. Whenever she or…hell even his dad, broke out that sing-song tune it meant that they were up to no good. Usually she'd start to bitch and complain about how unfair he was being, instead she was just standing there staring at him silently. It made a bit of worry overwhelm him,

"Too late for that." Those four simple words felt like a death sentence, oh so slowly he turned his head to face her. What exactly did she mean by… it was too late? A chill went down his spine…

"What did you do?" he asked hesitantly, unsure whether or not he wanted the answer. Maybe if he just ignored her, then she would leave well enough alone. The grin she gave him in response made him tense up in reflex. Without saying a single solitary damn word, Rukia slapped a single piece of shiny high-quality paper down onto his desk.

Ichigo glanced at… only glanced, and instantly realized that he should have just ignored her. It was too late, just as she had said. He felt a wave nausea kick in almost instantaneously, as he actually took in exactly what it was that he was staring at in open horror.

"NO WAY IN HELL!" He managed to gather up enough willpower to smother his desire to gag, so that he could bellow in outrage instead. The flyer was for a teen partner ice skating contest. He'd sooner sneak into Komamura's room at night and tried to shave him while he was asleep, then compete in that fucking contest! Death would be a kind reprieve from being forced to prance around in… oh good god…. What the hell was that guy wearing? Spandex? Ichigo would sooner commit seppuku then wear a giant piece of sparkly latex! He had his masculine pride to keep in check.

"I am not signing up for some dumbass ice skating contest. So don't even bother." An even wider grin took its place on Rukia's face. Oh god no… please no… tell him Aizen was tap dancing naked in front of his house. Tell him that Matsumoto was teaching his little sisters what sex was… anything… anything other then-

"I knew you'd say that, which is why I took the liberty of signing us both up ahead of time." His eyebrow twitched uncontrollably, as he fought the urge to strangle the shinigami girl. Ichigo kept thinking of Senbozakura using him to make certain that every single one of those tiny little blades were nice and sharp. Turning back to face his homework, he responded in a completely monotone voice.

"I guess you'll have to find another partner then. I'm sure Ishida wouldn't mind. Hell, he'd probably make the outfits for you." She glared daggers at him,

"It's under YOUR name!" Rukia protested vehemently.

"I don't have to do this!" He barked out in irritation, they were caught in a vicious stalemate. So there was only one thing she could do now…

"Do it for me… PLEASE!" She gave him her cute innocent shiny chibi eyes, the ones she used only when it was completely to her own advantage. His eyebrow continued to twitched, but the spasm had managed to start including his entire eyelid in the convulsion. She scowled when she realized that Ichigo had determinedly put his brakes on, and that he wouldn't concede unless she startd fighting dirty,

"Fine, then I'll just tell everyone at school you read shojo manga." His eyes widened and the twitching ceased as he stared at her in complete terror.

"You wouldn't…" His voice was tiny, nearly a squeak. A smug smirk slipped upon her lips, violet eyes flared with triumph. Rukia Kuchiki was the winner of this round, now she only needed to K.O. her victim.

"You're right… I'm thinking too small. I'll also tell Renji, Ikkaku, Zaraki-Taicho, Nii-sama, and oh who else… I would certainly tell Urahara… OH! Yoruichi-san would probably enjoy knowing that little tidbit of dirty gossip…" Ichigo grimaced and threw his hands up in dismay, he knew when he was beaten.

"FINE! I'll go to the damn contest with you!" a victorious smile settled on her facial features. Rukia plopped herself gleefully upon his bed, as Ichigo continued to give her dirty looks.

"Glad you saw it my way Ichigo." Her tone of voice was like that of a mother dealing with a petulant child. He flipped her off and she stuck her tongue out at him. Rukia then handed him a schedule.

"…What the hell is this…" he asked, confusion written clearly on his face. She arched a single elegant black brow in an expression of exasperation.

"It's your planner for this month. So get ready. We're going to be having private teachers." That was when the concept of money occurred to the living boy. His eyes narrowed in suspicion,

"How do you figure on paying for all of this Rukia?" she smiled at him sweetly but her eyes told him 'wouldn't you like to know'. Instead of giving him an actual verbal response, she only gave a secretive smirk before handing him a brand spanking new pair of ice skates.

"I took the liberty of getting you a pair as a belated birthday gift. So don't complain about how I never buy you anything!" The Kurosaki smirked at her

"I thought it was the guys' job to tell the girl that." She flustered and briefly lost her sharp edge. It was actually kind of cute the blush and the gaping mouth. Ichigo chuckled at the sight, Never thought he'd ever succeed at leaving Rukia Kuchiki speechless. Hell he hadn't even thought it was humanly possible. It was nice to know that he was wrong about that; apparently it WAS possible to stun her silent.

Interestingly enough, the skates were the right size, also a nice black coloring. He took note of that as Rukia slowly managed to gather her wits about her. They were a decent pair of ice skates, he'd never really owned any before. Truth was…he'd only skated once, when he was about five with his mom… he'd ended up on his butt one too many times. Never went back on the ice, without being forced against his will too. Ichigo wasn't exactly the most graceful individual on frozen water.

Rukia swatted him upside the head, and he turned to snap at her, but the expression on her face made his stop. Her pale cheeks were still a soft shade of pink, as she spoke quietly.

"Thanks Ichigo. I really appreciate you doing this for me." There was a long moment of silence as he could only stare at her. Rukia kept on surprising him at each turn. She was always showing him new facets to her personality, just when he had thought that he'd figured everything out about her. Not wanting to destroy the friendly moment between them, he just gave her a small smile and a nod. A silent 'You're welcome.'

Rukia gave him a brilliant genuine smile before all but skipping out of his bedroom, closing the door quietly behind her. Once he was certain that she was out of listening distance, Ichigo leaned back in his chair and stared at the black skates on his lap in dismay. Running a single hand through his hair before letting out a long sigh of irritation,

"Nice job getting yourself into this one Ichigo. Way to show her who's boss here." He closed his math book. No way he was going to succeed in getting homework done now.

"Women. Never make any damn sense." He huffed before placing the skates gently on top of his desk and collapsing upon his bed to take a short nap.

**TBC**

**I hope you call enjoyed this. I finally got around to rewriting this. I've been meaning to for quite a while. Never really thought it was all that popular, which was the key reason behind me not updating it at all. I had one friend who was a big fan of it, she kept pestering me to update it. Still kvetches about me writing the next chapter. By the way to kvetch is to complain/whine. It's Yiddish. Yiddish in a Bleach fic… Oy Vey… Okay it's like 11 at night… I think it's time I saved this and hit the hay. If you truly enjoy this, PLEASE PLEASE let me know, or else I won't bother fixing the next older versions of the chapters. If I don't fix those, then I won't write a new chapter. **

**I'm not trying to give you all a selfish reason to review. I've got a lot on my plate right now. I have two other big fics that people want updates on. So if this is to be worked on as well. I need to know how important it is to all you fans. Let me know. Please. Thank you tons.**


	2. Take 2: The lessons begin

**Title:** Ice skating Shinigami

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bleach so get over it! And if I did… Hiyori wouldn't have been beside herself like she was earlier in the manga. If you all get what I mean by that.

**Summary:**Rukia signs herself and Ichigo up for a partner ice skating contest what will the end of this adventure look like… success or disaster?

**Chapter:** 2/**7**

**Author Notes: **This is an updated and revised version of this chapter. Seeing as I had last worked on this when I was a Junior/Senior in high school, and I'm currently 21… it's been awhile to say the least.

"Hurry up Ichigo! Quit being such a slowpoke!" the fifteen-year-old orange haired boys response was to sulk even more. He already knew that this wasn't going to pretty. It was a fact; this was not going to be enjoyable for him. Here he was being dragged, against his will, to an ice-skating rink, for the biggest thorn in his side. She was a cute adorable thorn… but a thorn nonetheless. Rukia was a couple of feet ahead of him; it almost looked like she was skipping. Ichigo could only sigh deeply,

"How much further Rukia?" she glanced at him from over her shoulder, smirking at him, all she said in response was,

"You'll see." Like that wasn't vague as all hell. He had no clue if they were near or far, seeing as they were currently hiking down a path that was hidden in the middle of a FOREST. In the sweltering summer heat, they were as far as physically possible from an indoor ice rink! Unless she was lost and was too stubborn to come clean about it, he wouldn't put it past her. He'd have to get her a GPS for her next birthday.

"Will you just admit that we're lost?" The black haired shinigami gave him a dirty look. He stifled the urge to chuckle; past experience had taught that laughing while Rukia was pissed off was a really bad idea.

"I'M NOT LOST!" She snapped at him viciously, he simply rested his hands behind his head and looked up at the bright blue sky above them. A small smile played on his face. They continued on a bit further. Walking in mutual silence for almost ten minutes straight, before they finally reached a decent sized lake that sat in the midst of a small clearing. What Ichigo was staring at was a large body of water, not ICE. Ichigo's eyebrow twitched and he whacked her over the head… hard.

"IDIOT! Is this some kind of joke! It's NOT funny!" Rukia rubbed the back of head and gave him a rather annoyed look.

"You're the idiot IDIOT! Did you really thin I so stupid as to not bring help?" Ichigo glared at her, but as he did so there was a foreboding sensation that crept up in his mind. Movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention immediately. When he saw who had joined the two of them, his jaw fell.

An exceedingly disgruntled as well as unamused HItsugaya Toushiro emerged from behing a tree. A scowl ever present on his face as his turquoise eyes glowed with irritation. Crossing his arms, the white haired captain grumbled,

I can't believe I'm actually doing this…" At first all the human teen could do was stare, but quickly he recovered enough to shout in disbelief,

"TOUSHIRO!" Hitsugaya scowled even further,

"Are you ever going to call me by my respectful title?" He muttered, already knowing that the odds were slim to none. Ichigo's eyes flickered back and forth between the white haired shinigami and the black haired one. His mind was unable to completely absorb what was unfolding before him. He turned to face Rukia,

"He's teaching us?" His voice wasn't even attempting to stifle is shock at the situation. Rukia looked at him as though she was amused by his simplicity. She spoke in an almost haughty tone of voice,

"Are you kidding me?" The captain gave her a nasty look as if meaning to say 'what's that suppose to mean'? Rukia ignored him and continued on,

"Nope, not him, them!" The moment Ichigo saw who the mysterious 'them' was, he understand where the chill of foreboding had come from earlier. Out of the shadows emerged Yoruichi and Nanao Ise. He couldn't tell who was more frightening, the evil gleam in the cat woman's eye… or the frosty expression of annoyance on the eighth division vice captain's face. For some reason, Ichigo felt as though his feet were stuck in hardened concrete.

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this Rukia-san." There was a hint of frustration in the way Nanao spoke. Meanwhile Yoruichi scoffed with a grin on her face that would terrify satan himself.

"I don't know about you, but I'm looking forward to torturing Ichigo." All he wanted to do was to turn tail and flee as quickly as his feet would carry him. The feeling of his impending doom was suffocating him and slowly enshrouding all of his senses. Hitsugaya felt pity for the poor boy, as he found a spot on the ground close to the lake. As he released some of his reiatsu, slowly the water began to freeze over. The process would take all of approximately ten minutes, maybe less, to make certain that there wouldn't be any thin spots they could fall through.

Once he'd made himself comfortable, and pulled out the paperwork he had brought along with him, the captain glanced back at the orange haired human.

"Good luck Kurosaki." And he meant it too, as he watched the three females drag Ichigo onto the lake before he could even have the chance to respond.

It had only taken them five minutes to see what was already apparent… Ichigo couldn't skate for the life of him. All he managed to do since he'd laced up his skates and bit the bullet, was flail and cling to Yoruichi's arm like his life depended upon it. Thankfully, he'd always been a somewhat quick learner, if his bankai wasn't a sure sign of that. Still, it wasn't fast enough for the violet haired woman.

"You look like a chicken with its head chopped off Ichigo! Get your balance already!" She barked at him with a look of agitation. He had his arms out in front of him, not wanting to fall on his ass, like he'd already done about seventeen times. Without trying to exert the energy to attempt to face her, Ichigo just snapped from over his shoulder.

"SHUT UP DAMN YOU! YOU'RE NOT HELPING!" Rukia had managed to get the first part down pat, and he was still stumbling around. He'd never liked the cold, so ice skating or even hockey was never a big favorite past-time of his. Who in gods name enjoyed soggy wet freezing cold clothing that clung to you like a second layer of skin? Not him! That's for sure! What the hell did they expect of him? So far he'd fallen onto his ass, nearly given himself a bloody nose two times from falling on his face, and the he sent flying off the ice and into a tree. Yoruichi thought it would be fun to give him a 'light' push to get him started… without teaching him how to stop.

Hockey had to be a safer sport then figure skating! Rukia laughed happily as she skated circles around him while gloating, he glared daggers at her,

"Oh come on Ichigo. It's not that hard. You can do it." She spoke like he was some sort of baby, which evoked a low growl from the back of his throat. He was off after her before you could count to three. She shrieked and fled from the boy, startled at his burst of action. Yoruichi was stunned, she rested her hands on hips and chuckled once the shock had worn off.

"Guess he just needed the right type of motivation." She watched with a small smile as Rukia laughed while Ichigo was grinning and trying to catch up to her. The boy managed to build up enough momentum that he scooped the girl up, and promptly began to proceed with a vicious form of tickle torture. Rukia giggled and struggled to escape, a rogue elbow managed to catch him in the stomach. He released her, and gasped for breath, she joined him. There was no anger, just smiles and chuckles.

They all agreed that it was good idea to take a small break, let Hitsugaya rest for a bit. It was difficult to exert ones power for an extended period of time, especially for something so frivolous. Rukia was smiling brightly, her eyes all but sparkled with excitement. Her euphoria was clearly contagious, because Ichigo had a faint smile upon his own face as well. Nanao smirked at the teen,

"Now was that as terrible as you thought it would be?" Ichigo shrugged, the smile faded into smug satisfaction. She was right after all, he'd done a whole lot better then he'd initially expected. Before he could answer, Hitsugaya suddenly burst out with a shout,

"DAMN IT MATSUMOTO!" Everyone jumped, startled at this outburst from the captain. He'd remained silent up until that point; he was giving his cell phone a look that could have been translated to a desire to massacre whoever had messaged him. Which apparently was his vice captain, Matsumoto Rangiku. Nanao let out an exasperated sigh and Yoruichi smirked at the white haired boy.

"What did she do this time?" The cat woman asked with false innocent curiosity. Those aqua orbs narrowed to glare at her, he was gritting his teeth and she suspecting that any longer of having to deal with a hurricane like Rangiku, he'd have nothing but stumps left for teeth.

"Some moron told her that I was in the mortal realm… so she's decided that she deserved to tag along as well… THIS WAS WHY I DIDN'T TELL HER WHERE I WAS GOING! When I find out who gave her this information…. I'll kill them!" Nanao kept silent, since odds were that he'd offhandedly mentioned to Hinamori-chan, and she'd obliviously brought up around Rangiku. That's how these situations usually played out. Of course if she was right, then he wouldn't hold it against Hinamori… all of Sereitei knew about the crush the tenth division captain had on the fifth divisions vice captain.

Rukia blinked at Hitsugaya,

"Does that mean she's joining us?" A single white brow twitched, and Hitsugaya could already feel his temple throbbing.

"An army of Espada couldn't stop her." Yoruichi and Nanao shrugged in unison, both knowing all too well the force of nature that was Matsumoto. Rukia rose back onto her feet, brushing off her backside from any grass that might have remained. Once she was satisfied that all possible dirt had been removed, she offered a hand up to Ichigo. He stared at it for a moment, before the corner of mouth quirked upwards into a tiny little smile.

Accepting her hand, he rose to his feet as well. Mimicking Rukia's early motions to remove any dirt that had lingered, brushing his back clean as well. In his already irked mood, it didn't take all that long for the lake to freeze over the second time around. Nanao glided elegantly back onto the ice, turning to face the two 'pupils' she looked every bit the part of a school instructor.

"Well, now that you know how to start and stop… as well as crash into trees…" Ichigo grunted in confirmation of that. She continued,

"We'll begin on doing sharp turns, and doing smooth figure eights. It might sound ridiculous, but it will help you get a better grasp on what we will start you on later… Spins. You're no where near at that level just yet. Slow and steady is efficient with the amount of time you've been given to prepare." With that they all returned to the make-shift ice-rink. Leaving the captain to, now, viciously sign the documents which needed his approval.

It had been almost an hour since they had picked up again, and he was still making what looked like a dyslexic two-year-olds version of the number eight. At least, that was what Yoruichi was calling,

"Damn it Ichigo! You're supposed to get BETTER not WORSE!" she snapped angrily, he was tempted to give her a rude hand gesture, but knew that she'd probably break his finger off if he did. Instead he settled to snarling back,

"Shut up damn you! I'm trying!" Yoruichi gave him an extremely impatient look, similar to when she was teaching him to get stronger when they had been in Soul Society.

"Shut your trap! You managed to acquire Bankai in less then three days… this should be a walk in the park for you! So do it right the FIRST time!" He was right about to retort with something about him being human and having human limitations, when there was a cry of male outrage as well as a female one of frustration.

"Taicho!" Nanao burst out and there was no warmth to her voice… just irritation to a point that Ichigo knew any normal mortal would have died from obscenely high blood pressure.

"MATSUMOTO!" Hitsugaya snarled angrily… and the persona in question was smiling happily, as if oblivious to her taicho's rage. The carrot headed boy wondered if he was crazy, or if the temperature had dropped to practically subzero.

Rukia blushed and her eyes widened in both amazement and embarrassment, when she noticed who the third person was that had been unmentioned.

"Ukitake-taicho!" her captain gave her a small wave hello, as he trailed behind his two companions. Nanao was already off the ice and lecturing her captain before Ichigo even had a chance to react. Yoruichi chuckled softly,

"She's always been a mother hen in regards to Kyouraku." The boy glanced over at her in confusion, slightly bewildered. Yoruichi shook her head,

"It's nothing…Let's go make sure no one ends up killing each other." He nodded in agreement, and skated along after her.

"What are you doing here! I thought I told you to stay and finish the paperwork that I'd left on your desk for you! Did you even DO the paperwork! Why am I even asking? Of COURSE you didn't do the paperwork!" Nanao was pink cheeked, and she looked like she was on the verge of dragging her captain back to Soul Society by his ear. By the expression on Kyouraku's face… Ichigo was fairly certain that the older man would have no complaints to any physical attention given by the vice captain.

Ichigo stood off to the side along with Yoruichi, silently watching the interactions that were taking place. It seemed to remind him of a bunch of pissed off wet cats. His 'teacher' was leaning against a tree trunk, with an extremely amused glint her yellow eyes.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't turn you into an ice sculpture this instant!" Matsumoto smiled playfully at her captain, her blue eyes sparkling teasingly. She was one of the very few women that weren't terrified of Hitsugaya Toushiro's icy fury. Only a very brave or very stupid person could look an angry dragon in the eye and laugh.

"You can't honestly think it's fair that you get to have all the fun in the mortal world and leave me in boring old Soul Society. That would be just mean Taicho." She pouted at him, the white brow began to twitch again, Ichigo was beginning to think that the little captain should let his dad Isshin take a look at it. Hitsugaya growled some more random things at the buxom blonde that the teen couldn't quite catch.

"She gets away with a lot because she just steamrolls over him. That and he has a soft spot for her. A lot of us think they have a very big sister little brother relationship going on." Yoruichi said softly to him, so that the others wouldn't pick up on her little commentary. She was smirking in a way that worried the boy just a bit, thankfully she wasn't look at him, so he figured he was somewhat safe.

"Nanao-chan! How could you leave me behind like that? I was so lonely without you around!" Ichigo flinched unconsciously as a book as thick as his forearm came crashing down on the curly brown haired captain. First off, where the hell did she get that book. Second off, how the hell did she get away with beating up her own captain! As if sensing his confusion, Yoruichi explained once again for him,

"They have a very…uh… best word to describe it accurately would be… a very intimate relationship. There is a respect, and loyalty that allows her to get away with such things. As flirtatious as he is, Shunsui does care for her. So he doesn't her insults and lectures too seriously. Typically." Ichigo nodded in understanding. He relaxed, enjoying their little impromptu break.

Rukia seemed to slip into the slightly stoic, more responsible mask that she always wore when she was around higher ups. Whenever it was just her and Ichigo, she would be loud and irritating as all hell. He admired both aspects of her, it was quite a talent to be able to understand how it is appropriate to act where, and adapt to what is expected. The only big difference between how she acted around say, Byakuya, and how she was around her own captain… was that there was a deep warmth and fondness when she looked at the white haired man. That warmth and fondness had only just begun to show itself around the male Kuchiki.

"Are you alright Ukitake-taicho?" She asked with a hint of concern in her voice. He smiled at her, waving off her concern,

"I'm fine. Just felt like it was a good idea to make sure that these two won't run amok on their own." Yoruichi chuckled and grinned at the man, he looked over at her. Ichigo could tell that they understood exactly what kind of trouble the two would get into otherwise. At the same time, she knew that he wanted an excuse to check up on Rukia. She leaned over to whisper to Ichigo, while Rukia was engrossed in conversation with Ukitake.

"He has a bit of a father-complex when it comes to your girl." Ichigo instantly flushed a bright beet red. He sputtered and his eyes widened as he tried to stutter out some sort of response but was unable to form any sort of coherent train of thought. Suddenly all eyes were on him, and he was flustered beyond belief. Rukia gave him a confused yet bemused smirk, he blushed and looked away as Yoruichi burst out laughing. He muttered expletives under his breath before gliding back on the ice.

Ichigo frowned deeply as he practiced his sloppy figure eights at a further end of the lake. Was it bad that he was glad that Hitsugaya was irked as he was, because now the boy didn't have to just focus on using his energy to freeze the water, he did it just because he was pissed. How handy was that? He snorted in irritation as he made what looked more like a mutated six. The boy swore quietly, so focused on his own thoughts that he was oblivious to the person who joined him.

He didn't have a crush on Rukia. That was a stupid think for Yoruichi to even suggest. She was just trying to get a rise out of him… and she'd succeeded. Damn it.

"I don't know what she said, but don't let it bother you." His head jerked up to face a small face framed by black hair. He stared at Rukia with an expression of surprise. How long had she stood there watching him? From the arguing, he could tell that the others were sufficiently distracted. Ichigo scoffed and tried to play the nonchalant card.

"Tell me something I don't already know." She punched him lightly on the shoulder, and even as she did, there was a smile on her face.

"Look down, moron." He did, while he wasn't paying attention, he'd skated three perfect eights. Her skate marks lined up right beside his own. After the shock worse off, he couldn't help but give her a small smile. Maybe this wouldn't be so horrible after all.

He spared a glance back at the cluster by the edge of the forest, seemed like they had dispersed. Hitsugaya was back to sitting and brooding angrily, Ichigo was shocked that he hadn't gashed through the paper with how much force he was using to sign them. Matsumoto was sitting with Ukitake and Kyouraku drinking, what the boy could only assume was, sake and laughing merrily.

Yoruichi and Nanao were returning to continue the training, a scowl was firmly in place on the vice captain's face. Meanwhile, the cat woman looked rather amused by the whole situation. Rukia pat him on the back with a sympathetic smile,

"Don't worry, Yoruichi might be hard with you… at least she has more patience then Ise-fukutaicho. Between the two, I'm beginning to think that you got lucky." Ichigo gave her a skeptical look, she shrugged innocently before skating over to meet up with her teacher. If he hadn't known better, Ichigo would have though that she was trying to make him feel better.

Before he could actually think about what she'd meant by her words, Yoruichi smacked him on the back of the head. The force nearly sent him face first onto the ice, thankfully he'd gotten better balance. He turned to snarl at her but froze mid-motion by the evil look on the woman's face.

"Yo-Yoruichi?" his voice sounded so small to him. Ichigo was beginning to wonder how Urahara was able to endure her constant torment… The only reasonable conclusion was that the man had to have a fetish for getting beaten up by the cat. Masochism much?

"Skate!" she commanded, and he didn't hesitate to do so. Each command she gave felt like a whip strike. Now Ichigo was certain… Urahara had to have a Masochistic tendency, it was the only way he could endure such cruel abuse.

By the end of the day, Ichigo was collapsed on his back, completely out of breath. Yoruichi was grinning down at him,

"There we go… see… that wasn't so hard." The boy glared death at her,

"I-hate-you." He said between deep breathes. She smirked

"Love you too, now get up off your ass and head home. Rest up so that we can start on the next move tomorrow alright?" Ichigo let out a long groan of agony.

He had to force himself to his feet, and all but limped over to where everyone else was. Hitsugaya was ushering his vice captain back to Soul Society with no hesitation whatsoever. Rukia had already bid his captain farewell, Nanao was forcing her captain to leave the mortal realm. Everyone was going their separate ways and he stopped to invite Yoruichi to tag along with him and Rukia, but a flash of blonde on the opposite side of the lake told him that she already had company to walk with her back to town.

The boy waved to Urahara, think of the devil and he was come. The shopkeeper tipped his hat in return, Yoruichi was gone before they could say good bye. All Ichigo had the heart to think was, good riddance.

By the time they'd all split up and gone their separate ways, it had been an extra hour. They didn't get to his house till it was seven pm. He promptly collapsed onto his bed, this was not how he wanted to spend his summer break. His muscles screamed in complaint and when Rukia patted his shoulder in a gesture of sympathy, he winced in pain.

"See Ichigo, that wasn't so bad." IF he heard one more person say that damn line, he was going to break out Zangetsu, and carve him or her up into small tiny pieces, and feed them to Kon! Odds were high that he was going to have bruises all over his body once he got the energy to finally change into his PJ's. What the hell had he gotten himself into?

Suddenly, his bedroom door was flung open and his father leapt in, about to jump-kick Ichigo, but upon realization of who beat up his son was he caught himself. A bit overdramatically Isshin flailed frantically.

"Ichigo! What happened!" the boy brushed off the worry,

"I'm fine, don't worry about it…" his father dropped the act and gave him a curious look.

"Are you sure? Maybe I should check those bruises out." Ichigo waved his hand in dismissal.

"I'm fine dad. I appreciate the offer. Thanks but no thanks." He managed to persuade his father out of his room. Once the door closed he collapsed back onto his bed again, groaning in pain.

"I'm not going to last another day of that torture." Kon poked his head up over the edge of the mattress.

"What's up Ichigo? Did someone beat the shit outta yah? Sure looks like it."

"Bug off Kon." The teddy lion didn't give up, he started to poke at one of the bruises,

"Tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me-" Ichigo grabbed the stuffed head and chucked the doll into his closet before slamming it shut violentely. He just didn't have the patience for that crap.

**Meanwhile in Soul Society**

"Hold up. Ichigo is learning WHAT?" Ikkaku and Renji said simultaneously to the voluptuous tenth division vice captain. She looked at them like she was dealing with some slow children.

"How to ice skate, with Rukia-chan, supposedly for some ice skating competition. That's all I know." Ikkaku was burst out laughing. while Renji sat in shock.

That has got be probably one of the gayest things any man with a shred of masculine pride would do. If Ichigo wanted to act like some sort of fruitcake then so be it, but he had no right to drag Rukia into it. The red haired vice captain leapt up to his feet and practically shunpoed to his captains office. Renji figured that Byakuya ought to know what his adopted 'sister' was up to down in the other world.

**TBC **

**I hope you enjoyed this. Please Review!**


	3. A few unwanted spectators

1**Title:** Ice Skating Shinigami

**Author:** icedragongurl

**Rating:** T for language and whatever else may take place in my insane mind

**Anime:** Bleach

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it, I wish I did because Aizen would die a horrible torturesome death and Hinamori would get over her obsession and Kira would have a personal therapist to deal with those anxiety issues he seems to have...

**Chapter: **3/15

Ichigo stared in disbelief at the three people that decided to show up, only three days after he agreed to this little whim of Rukia's and they're already being paid a visit from Byakuya, Ikkaku, and Renji. He didn't appreciate being stared at like he was some kind of freak, he especially DIDN'T appreciate the fact that Ikkaku was laughing so hard that if he wasn't already dead, he would have died from laughing too hard. Byakuya, now he was on a different level of reaction from the others, he didn't show ANY reaction!

Rukia was frozen staring while Hitsugaya and Nanao had a look of genuine interest on their faces, who could blame them? This was going to be an interesting show. "What the hell are you two doing?" Renji asked while holding back his laughter, this had to have been the most ridiculous thing he had ever seen. Ichigo sitting on his ass, on ice, wearing denim pants and a black shirt with the words death in white and a red skull below the words.

"Nii-sama..." Rukia managed to stutter out, the aforementioned mans eyes flickered over to her then back to Ichigo. "What do you think you're doing Kurosaki?" was all the Kuchiki said. Ichigo got back up to his feet and pushed Rukia over to them, "Ichigo!" she yelled in embarrassment, "It was her idea. Bitch to her, not me." he crossed his arms and glowered at the men. Ikkaku grinned in amusement, "What's next the skin tight outfits with the shiny glitter?" Renji smirked at that comment.

"Well whatever it is, Rukia isn't going to be involved with it." Byakuya said in a faint hint of irritation, which yet of course he didn't show in the slightest. "But..." all eyes were on the petite female in the pale yellow short dress. Rukia was clearly flustered, having not expected her brother to end up being involved in this whole deal. "It was my idea, I told Ichigo that if he didn't help me with this then I'd tell everyone that he read shoujo manga." Ichigo's face went beet red and Ikkaku and Renji burst out in another round of laughing their asses off.

"I do not!" he retorted as he whacked her one upside the head, she scowled at him and rubbed her new bump, "You do too!" he was so embarrassed that it wasn't even funny anymore. Though clearly the two morons thought it was, "Do you collect teddy bears as well?" Ikkaku asked in between gasps for air. (_Back in the Kurosaki household Kon was overcome with fit of sneezing_) .

Renji glowered at Ichigo, "She's coming back with us." the other boy glared back "She got us into this mess she's staying and taking responsibility for her damned mess." lightning flashed between their eyes. "How do we know it wasn't you that blackmailed HER?" Ichigo rolled his eyes, "Who's more likely to follow through with blackmail...me...or her?" the red heads eyes flickered from one to another then back again. "Rukia."

The black haired girl scowled "Not true. I'm innocent and adorable." Renji and Ichigo scoffed "Far from it." they said at the same time before glaring at each other. "I've known you for a longer period of time then Kuchiki-taicho has, I think I would know." Rukia glared at the vice captain "Shut up." Byakuya let out an exasperated sigh, this was honestly getting out of hand, any longer and he would kill the two idiots with out the use of his zanpakutou.

"Enough." The fighting ceased and all eyes were on the taicho "Rukia, we are leaving, now." the captain turned to leave, "I can't do that, Nii-sama." all movement froze with those simple words. Even Rukia seemed taken aback by what she had said, but continued anyways, with that determined gleam in her eyes yet again "What Ichigo said was true, I do need to take responsibility for what I've gotten he and I into. I apologize but I can not go with you."

Byakuya gazed at her with a curious look that still managed to somehow pass as unemotional. She was right, but he wasn't about to give up without a fight. "So be it, but... when this so called competition of yours takes place, I wished to be informed immediately." Rukia's eyes widened in shock and disbelief, with a wide smile she nodded while bowing "Hai!" Renji gave a horrified look "Bu-but taicho!" Ichigo had a victorious smirk on his face as he stood behind the smaller girl.

"Let's go Abarai-fukutaicho." the superior said in an his icy cold demeanor, the subordinate nodded and hurried after, Ikkaku smirked "Don't think I won't tell Zaraki-taicho about this Ichigo, I will." Ichigo frowned as usual and shouted "Just get your ugly ass out of here already!" Ikkaku grinned at the lame comeback but left anyways. Hitsugaya scoffed "Typical Byakuya, as emotionless and stony as a damned rock. Hell even a rock has more facial expressions. Yet he manages to pull it off with tact."

Rukia smiled a small smile "Yes he does. He does indeed." another swat on the head brought her out of her daze. "Come on idiot! We have to get the practice done for today! Let's get a move on already!" Rukia scowled at him then smiled, she knew what the true reason behind him standing up for her was. With a knowing grin, she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him down, just to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thanks Ichigo..." she said before letting him go and skating away.

Ichigo was stunned but when that wore away he was left with nothing but a small smile, with shaping up to actually being worth something. No matter how troublesome it was.

Tbc


	4. help

1Author Notes:

I have an official writers block, if any of you have any ideas... I'm BEGGING you... help! Any ideas at all would be helpful! Email them to me at or pm me or put them in a review but give your computer name so I can give thanks in my next chapter, the chapters are going to become longer soon so don't worry about that much.


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